New Moon in Cancer in the Third

Posting something on here now is the modern version of putting a letter in a bottle and flinging it into the ocean, thanks to my mental breakdown or whatever it was when I realized I couldn't walk without  a Zimmer Frame, went into a decline, stopped posting and lost my two followers and my 90-day Duolingo streak. That was in May. 

Mid-July now and my misery's turned into acceptance of my fate - not being able to walk without a walker - with every now and again a glimpse of the future flitting by. 

Bathroom is being re-modeled to walk-in shower, broken concrete on patio smoothed out, helped along by Jupiter in Leo in the fourth. 

Mars Conjunct Uranus in the First

This is the day I was told I'd be getting a hip transplant, long before I discovered my heart is working at only 25% of its capacity and that has to be taken care of before I can get cardiac clearance, if I ever do. 

So from the sublime to the ridiculous, what has happened today is I placed an order with Walmart this morning to be delivered between four and six, and when I went to the laptop to see why I'd heard nothing by five, I discovered I hadn't hit the Place Order button. Thus my life has gone. 

Sun Sextile Jupiter

I suppose the real question is whether I'm going to go on with this "blog" or not, now that I have no readers because of losing the one I had when I stopped writing weeks (months?) ago. 

That's not the real question at all. The real question is how long I'm going to go on like this. Miserable, in despair, stuck in the house, can't walk. 

And needless to say, my day was not filled with fun and friends and family. 

Venus in the Fifth

This should be amusing, if your sense of humor's as black as mine has turned. Nothing in the date book, not that there has been anything lately except doctor visits, and so far not one of those till the 28th, in Tucson no less.

So - become the transit: 

Progressed Saturn conjunction natal North Node for the rest of my life, in Cancer in the Third.

Just writing that is enough to send me back to bed. Not sure I can mature into my life's purpose when I have no idea what my life's purpose is, except I'm sure it's NOT hobbling around here on a walker all day, unable to do anything I used to do.

Of course I'm not usually hobbling around on a walker. I'm usually in bed as I'm too depressed to get up, but yesterday I vowed to make some kind of change and so this morning spent hours trying to do laundry - not trying, I did it, even though it was difficult to carry sheets while using the walker and it took four trips from the washer/dryer back to the bedroom. 

Become the Transit or Suffer the Transit

 This just might be a (the?) way out. If I can do it.

The Return of this Poor Blog

 Jupiter in the Fourth

Time for settling down and putting down roots. So what if one has owned the house for 24 years and is  making the improvements only so it will sell for more money when one is dead? Positive thinking, that's what it's all about. And ONE of the improvements is to help me while I'm alive - remodeling the little bathroom by taking out the old tub and replacing it with a walk-in shower with grab bars, now that I need a hip replacement and can't walk - due to begin today but the astrologer forgot all about Mercury Retrograde so the plumber has a family emergency and probably won't be able to begin till Monday, if then because it's Fourth of July on Saturday so Monday may well be a holiday. 

How's that for a start? 

Shadow Work

Or,

Progressed Saturn conjunct natal north node in Cancer 

as well as transiting Saturn in the Twelfth

An extremely horrible transit and one I'm not sure I'm strong enough to get through. 

Destined to be fulfilled?